I am not a good writer. When I was little, I wanted to be a great writer. I thought they were deep and had something to share. I wanted to share. The problem was, I think I was just too young to be deep. By the time I had some deep emotions, I wasn't writing anymore, or attempting to write.
Now, the only time I have a desire to write is when I want to get something on my chest that I can't get to go away. Or sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night and can't sleep. Then, at this very inconvenient time, when I am lying in bed with my oh.so.snuggly.bubbies. and my guy, who is out like a light, I get these great things to write about in my head.
Here's the thing. I am not a good writer.
So my thoughts that I have, seem to flow and I think they would come out beautifully. Perfectly put together, even. Except... I have not actually written any words down from one of these flowing, thoughtful, inspiring, moments in time. So, who is to say that these phrases, at best, would be as great as I thought they were by the morning.
Now, I have labeled them as phrases. This is because, I try to repeat what they are in my head instead of continuing them. All in hopes of remembering it in the morning, and all at the expense of not continuing this great thought and seeing where it may go. So therefore, I get phrases. Not stories, or complete thoughts. However, in reality, I get nothing. By the sunrise, they have been wiped away with the dreams of my sleep and forever have disappeared into the universe, floating around me with many other unwritten, unshared words. Just like that, they are lost, like the hour on the clock.
So there it is. I am not a good writer.
It would help if I could actually write things down. That would be a big step. It is a completely different issue that I actually not well versed in proper forms of writing. My papers in college were C+ at best. I really had to work and rewrite and get peers to reread and edit just to get that A/B on occasion.
